Dear Transgendered People...

Dear Transgendered People,

There’s a letter header I never thought I’d be writing. Can we please have a conversation about this bathroom bill stuff?

As woman who was born female, and has always felt like a female, I know that I cannot possibly understand your life. At the same time, I really feel like the intention of recent legislation is being hijacked and distorted. As I have read many of House Bills that have passed through legislation, I don’t see them as the discrimination bills that they are being played as in the media. I see them as protection bills for the general public, especially our most vulnerable.

 North Carolina’s HB 2 or “Public Facilities Privacy and Security Act,” is not meant to single you out, but has the intent of ensuring 'reasonable accommodation' for all.

Is that too much to ask? Is it too much to ask for a mom, shopping for school clothes, with her young children, to have them try on clothes in a dressing room, without a male audience? Target seems to think so with their recent press release.

 What could go wrong there?

So let’s just get to the angst that many of us parents, and women in particular are feeling. This isn't about YOU. 

We don’t care that you have changed your person, wear a skirt, or butch your hair short.

We don’t care that you wear makeup, take hormones to make your facial hair grow or stop growing, WE don’t care. This isn't about YOU!

WE don’t see you as a threat. We may not understand your journey, or relate to your dilemma. (Many of us Bio-females gave up pantyhose years ago. We find them binding. So for someone to intentionally wear them, whilst transitioning to the opposite sex, on purpose…is perplexing to us. Just Saying) Again, you are not the threat. We do not see you as a predator.  This may sound harsh, but some of us, don’t see you at all.

What we do see is the 400,000 registered sex offenders using bathrooms, and changing rooms as new “playgrounds.” We see the 80,000-100,000 convicted and released offenders that are not on the registry. And most of all, we see the not yet caught offenders who look nothing like you.  I had an encounter with such a man when I was 4 years old, at a daycare, in a bathroom. But this is not about me anymore then it is about you. It’s about our children.

 Not everyone is as virtuous as you or I.

Registered Sex offenders, are supposed to distance themselves from places like schools and other kid oriented events and activities, however enforcement of these policies are sorely lacking. Public buildings, malls, stores and other settings will become a ‘safe place to offend’. It’s already happened in the last few weeks, with the non-transgendered pushing the envelope in states that has adopted the 'now anyone can enter, anytime, anywhere' policies.

So I am asking you to take a step back. Although I recognize your need to be validated, I am asking you and your people in your PR dept., recognize the greater issue is of the physical, and emotional safety of our children and others. 

Sex offenders offend minors 44% of the time. Which obviously mean they offend adults male or female 56% of the time. That’s your sister in college, your mom, and yes, even your Grama. 

68% of sexual assaults are never reported to the police, and 98% of rapists will never spend 1 night in jail. And, are free to rape again.

 This should concern you. This is bigger than you and the need to be validated.

So please tell your PR people to stop with homophobic speak. It's a lie. 

Stop the victim mentality mantra, and think about the actual victims here. And think about those that are now being equipped with free pass, to offend more openly. Your rights, give them power.

Behind closed doors.